Sunday, April 27, 2008

when that thing that should control the world doesn't

are we too different?
do we want the same thing and just can't make it clear
are we too yin or too yang,
or is the biggest thing fear?

i see crystals big and small
floating on the surface of water,
there are emeralds hidden in the grass, too.
and when the sun rises up
and up we finally realize where we are
and it won't matter how far we've come
or where we're going,

as long as I'm with you,
as long as I'm with you.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

The true meaning of love

and someone sang:

and realized my mistake...

"I need love!
Love's divine!
Please forgive me
Now I see that I've been blind
Give me love, love is what I need to help me know my name."

I an not a poor, ghetto child who worked himself into success. Nor will I ever be, of course. I am not a genius, nor an ambitious entrepreneur, nor a young success story. I am a young man who's idea of success for so long (indeed even now) is love.

I felt, I feel that a love that I can count on both in the girl and in my own heart, is success. A child, a wife, a marriage in the future and a partner for the rest of my life is my vision of success. I want love that transcends boundaries and obstacles.

Well, I have discovered that life is a lot more complicated than love. One must be successful to show objects to friends, to hold up golden fleeces and stories to peers and opponents alike. We must have plaques adorned with sequin. We must make our families and friends know that we are exceptional. We must be on the tongues of others. Love will be a back note ultimately.

I have just broken my own heart. I don't know if it was my own choice or not. We are separated from animals by our ability to choose right from wrong, moral from un-ethical. Our primal instincts are ours to resist if we choose it. Love is not enough. Love cannot defeat circumstance. I do not know if love can defeat primal urge and instinct. If it can it is worth fighting for.

I am in love, an d will always love, the woman I have separated my heart from.

For all the rest, I claim ignorance. I will feel.