I currently can not finish a blog (currently working on: Yunnan, starting work at a business in SH, family and friends) on anything.
For the hell of it, here is a post in the tradition of my old xanga ones. Totally inward-looking, diary style, full of raw emotions and some teenage angst stop plights, and guaranteed to bore you to tears. Well, it's my blog and I'll write what I want to.
Between a rock and a hard place. Last one to leave the office on a Friday night, make the commute that has become an always changing sea faces; changing faces that also always creates the same, gray mural.
Anger and disbelief, pride and a questioning of right and wrong. How far can I be pushed? Am I an angry person waiting to snap and hidden beneath a thin layer of the calmest frosted ice?
I am tired, semi-lonely, unfulfilled, and find it hard to believe I was happily talking with my Mom who is retiring today just a five hours ago. Hard to believe I was being doted on with fresh pasta by the beautiful girl I'm in love with just three hours ago.
Fulfillment is a day to day thing. It's in your plans you set for yourself. It is in the music you listen to and what you allow yourself to experience little by little. It is familiar often enough, but you will be surprised at how many familiar places, people, and things will brighten up your life and give you a nostalgic tug that shakes you out of the mundane.
I just chose a bad night to write about instead of a good one. Sounds like me.
1 comment:
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