I looked back at this post I never finished, I am ashamed of myself as a human being. So, I will add edits in red text...I mean...this was started back in December!
Been almost a month (longer) since I last blogged. I have started tutoring English to a nine-year old Korean boy named Howard. Howard's English is already pretty good, and his parents are very kind; I was a bit hesitant to ask for 200 RMB an hour but they readily accepted. If DC Lee can charge 300 an hour, then I shouldn't be reticent to charge 200. I asked Howard when I met him what his favorite color was:
"It's always changing. Right now it's blue." My family has a lot of home videos of my sister and I when we were young. Howard's voice sounds just like mine when I was a couple years younger than him. I'm mentioning this because boys talk about the same things or because we all sound the same before puberty, but he sounds A LOT like I did. He's a good kid, and in contrast to New World Baby ( a mostly bad experience teaching that I think I reflected on already in a blog, i hope) I feel I can make a difference with his English level.
The result of my tutoring? I don't think I improved Howard's English a bit. We ended up disliking each other, him climbing like a monkey all over the study room and saying "I don't want toooooo!", me wishing I had taken a firmer stance with him instead of playing the nice guy. I could get away with being nice and being someone kids could talk to at Kingsbury (years ago) because I did not actually have the direct responsibility of teaching them. At that time, I was more like a stress buffer for the teachers, allowing the kids someone to play with while they finally got a chance to exhale. Basically, with Howard, I gained a new respect for teachers. It's a tough job, and one that could make me hate kids. Thus, I had to quit and vow never to teach kids again. Call me a quitter, I just did.
Met with Mr. Barrett yesterday in People's Square. It had been over half a year since we had contact; we met back in March during a very interesting "business" meeting with an interesting Chinese "developer." During that meeting, my role for the "developer" was to act as his "little helper" in another Chinese city while he tried to wine and dine potential investors. If they gave him money? Well, Mr. Developer took out an old receipt and scribbled on the back RMB 10,000 (about $1,430). The flight and the food would all be paid for by him; he needed a young international to make him look better to these potential Chinese clients.
I didn't know what the fuck was going on, honestly. He had brought me to a fast food place and treated me to a never ending, copious amount of tea. He told me he could teach me Chinese in four months better than any school, and he told me he could introduce me to good contacts in Shanghai to jump start my career. He told me a lot of things, but between the buzz I was starting to get from the 82nd cup of tea, his greasy long hair and nails, and the fact I had been there for two and half hours already...well, I could not get a recurring vision of being sold into slavery, robbed and left dead far from home, or anally raped. He kept saying "little helper". Freaky.
So I had my guard up, vowing not to give in to the power of the tea and agree fully to this deal. Finally, Mr. Barret walked in, all long hair parted down the middle and bushy mustache. And white. From Virginia with a house in Florida. Fluent in Chinese to boot. I thanked God a little bit, unaware of the possible irony to follow.
To cut that story within a story short, Mr. Barret (who was trying to use the developer's contacts for his own work) saved me from a sketchy trip with a sketchy man. Barret told me that it was a safe proposition by Mr. Developer, but that he understood that I was very hesitant to go as I had just come to Shanghai. He was American and experienced in China; he spoke fluent Chinese, and had a boisterous energy that exuded confidence and made me feel safe. We said we would keep in contact, and about seven months after that faithful meeting in a fast food tea place, we met again in People's square for coffee and lunch.
Mr. Barret is a devout Christian trying to set up a recognized charitable organization in Shanghai. He has a non-recognized one already, which raises and provides money and goods to families and people in need of surgery, musical instruments, food, or just financial help in hard times. Most of the beneficiaries are Christian as well, for example the family of a pastor in the countryside, but anybody in need is viable for help from them. During lunch I learned a lot from him and the politics of China.
To become a legit charity, Barret would need a lot of money from a big Chinese businessman who is Christian. Big money meaning over a million.
"He wasn't impressed with me, and to tell you the truth, David, I wasn't really impressed with him and his wealth, either." They had met before in the businessman's huge office in Guangzhou.
Mr. Barret told me that the opportunity to take the man's money and found a charity, in the name of that man, was available. I questioned why he did not take it, as another requisite is that all organizations and charities must be in the name of a Chinese. Barret's answer came like this:
"I do the work of God not because I am seeking some kind of reward in the afterlife, nor do I do it because I want His praise. A true Christian follows the word of God, and is in step with His plan. Too many nowadays do good in His name as a ticket into the pearly gates. I have helped a lot of people, and of course when they thank me I feel their gratitude...but I do it because it is the right thing to do according to God. Also, once we are in line with his plan, sometimes we have to question Him when He is not doing His work."
Question God?
"Yes, a passage in the Bible that has been disputed for many many years says that we must question God when he seems to be getting off track with his plan."
Mr. Barret told me a story of a poor pastor in the countryside and his musically gifted daughter. They could afford no piano to give her a chance at being special. Mr. Barret prayed that night for God to grant this family it's wish, and help this little girl.
After a week, God answered Mr. Barret and said that it would be done in three weeks, at the end of the month. Wait, was the answer to Barret's prayers and so he did.
After just nine days, an American doing business in China offered Barret a baby-grand piano from his old home that he had no use for. This man was a Christian. He had been having an affair in China for half a year, while his wife and children waited for him back home in the States.
"I could not accept his piano," Mr. Barret told me.
Another two weeks passed, and nothing happened. Mr. Barret began to panic, and prayed to God telling Him that he had to keep His word and execute His plan.
"Now remember, You told me You would help this little girl. I remain your humble servant, but the end of the month has come and gone, and I am worried You have forgotten Your word."
The next day, a Chinese woman called Mr. Barret, and spoke excitedly with him. She had been fired from her old job some months ago. The reason she had been fired was the same reason many in China are let go: workers get an annual raise in salary, and companies fire them so they can hire new workers at lower prices. She had already started working a job shortly after she was fired and was not resentful of her previous situation. However, unexpectedly a new manager from the woman's old company had called her just a couple of days ago and offered her severance pay, unheard of, and a personal apology, even more unheard of. Acceptable reasons for laying off workers, severance pay, these are aspects of capitalism that are just coming into widespread practice in China. Here is still a time and business culture where making money is the only ethic.
"It was like a miracle, them admitting they were wrong." The woman was a devout Christian like Mr. Barret. Her miracle was a sincere apology from a big company and a sum of money just enough to buy a quality piano.
It was generously accepted.
This story is true, and I have no reason to doubt it. I spoke with Mr. Barret about my studies in Chinese, about my searching for a soul in Shanghai. I expressed to him my desire to help people and do something bigger and more meaningful, that when i think of doing good I get excited, motivated, and everything becomes clear...even in a murky place like Shanghai. He told me that even though i am not a Christian, he felt that I had a lot of the values Christianity is about.
Whether this would help me during Judgement, he said he didn't know. We said we would meet again and wished each other luck.
I have not, though I have given thought, become Christian. I have not followed a spiritual path as of yet. I have not even found my niche in Shanghai yet.
But I think i am getting there, and whatever the path may be, I will follow it.
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