Angry and solemn-faced strangers pushing their way through a dense network of metal, concrete, and cigarette smoke. It is easy to feel alone in a new place, and I feel like a little kid being dropped off by his dad, Day # 1 of Kindergarten, when Doug waves goodbye after telling the cab driver where to go.
This is not like last spring. Last spring I would venture out into Chinese cities alone knowing that I had a group of Americans back at the hotel, and yet feeling like I didn't need them because I was a traveler who liked to experience things away from other Americans. It is a lot easier to walk a tightrope with a safety net below. My confidence now is gone, I dread having to speak Chinese after having not practiced. The smiles and wondrous stares I remembered getting from Xian to Xiamen aren't here in the most modern city in Shanghai. Jiao Tong University didn't even give us info on where to go for registration. A feeling has set up shop in my gut. And as I find myself looking at signs for building all in Chinese characters, the feeling opens his round mouth and is saying "What the Hell am I doing in this place?"
No comments:
Post a Comment